So another month in 2011 has come and gone and I have met no goals that I have set. I’ve decided perhaps I’m just lazy, selfish and irresponsible. What it comes down to is a fundamental I don’t want to that dictates what I do and do not do. What I do not do is exercise, eat well or keep budgets. What I do is eat McDonalds, socialize with friends, lay around and spend money. I seem to be acutely aware of my transgressions but have no actual desire to change anything. Its an awful situation to be in (and realistically a probably easily remedied one) because I know everything that I do wrong, but I just don’t want to change it.
In essence I didn’t exercise once this month. I started out really good entering in what I ate daily for about 11 days and then I stopped. That was also the last time I weighed in — eek not looking forwarding to seeing how that number has fluctuated in the last 3 weeks. I’ve definitely accrued new debt. I’m constantly kicking myself for the fact that I could have paid of all of my credit cards but didn’t and instead accrued back debt that I had just paid off. Oh and back in November didn’t refinance the mortgage when the rates were 4.25%. FAIL. I did per the detox email The New Godmother weekly my spending and the first week there was definitely a feeling of nervousness of showing actual figures to someone, but that quickly went away after the first email. I feel inclined to continue sending it weekly to her, but I don’t feel like its having the desired outcome. She now is aware of the same thing I am — we eat out too much. I buy the kids too much stuff. These aren’t things I didn’t know.
Something new I’m going to try for March is not carrying credit cards with me. If I don’t have them then clearly I can’t spend. What I’ll wind up doing is maybe taking cash out and I can only spend the cash I have on hand. This will become effective tomorrow. Because I’ve already had two happy hours this week and tonight is a friend’s birthday dinner. Maybe better would be only carrying the card when I know I have to spend something like tonight’s dinner or next week when I’m having lunch with a co-worker for her birthday. We’ll see. Clearly I need to get back into the mode I was in last spring thru summer when I was a debt reduction powerhouse. I think what helped is that I didn’t pay daycare for almost 6 months so I had lots of excess cash and what doesn’t help now is that I pay 3x the amount in daycare than I did last year. We got our state tax refund last week and are expecting our federal one any day now and the H gets his yearly bonus in 2 weeks which is great, what would again be greater is that with that money we would be in a great spot, in a lets go on vacation great spot, but instead its just short of covering all of our debt. And not accruing more isn’t really in sight. We still have not figured out what to do about the fact that Squeegee died and the SIL is going to be needing her car back soon.
And exercise? Well yesterday I should have bought the Living Social deal for the Bikram Yoga studio in Woodbury, but I didn’t. As much as I complain every single day that none of my clothes fit me (which they don’t) another month passes and I’ve done nothing to remedy it. It comes down to the excuse that I’m too tired, too busy and work too late. Which are also all good excuses because when you don’t come home until 6:30 by the time you make dinner, get everyone to bed you’re: a) exhausted b) its 10pm and time for bed and c) rather watch Idol in bed and eat double stuf oreos.
I can’t wait until Bella is 3 before I get my ass in gear like I did with Bear. Mostly because when Bella is 3 I intend for her to have a 1 year old sister by then and if I’ve added more pregnancy weight on top of this pregnancy weight well then my friend I would be huge.
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